The Price


On the good old Earth,
back in the Time of the Great Mother Goddess,
aka the Golden Age of Free Love.

Back in the time before Baal and Anat,
Apsu and Tiamat.

Back when
Man
still t  i  l  l  e  d,
and not merely
f
i
l
l
e
d,
the womb of
Woman,
(sawing love, and in return, reaping
warmth
and
delight).

Back when no one ever had any reason to flee
or fight.

Back when Gilgamesh was not yet born,
and no city needed to surround
itself
with grotesque
stone
WALLS.

Back in the Time of Openness and Reaching Out,
the Coming Together,
rather than
F
a
l
l
i
n
g
A p a  r   t.

Back when people used to make
love
to the land,
and the Raping had not yet begun.

Back when there were no great floods,
and no angry men speaking in the name of angry gods,
and no holy texts, and no holy laws,
and no frenzied crowds to stone
the Sinners,
and no docile crowds to watch and applaud.

Back when each of us had a name
that was
earned,
and not simply       given.

Back when there was no need for messiahs or
salvation,
when all yearning was for greater knowledge
and greater harmony with the
Universe,
rather than
love
and
acceptance
(for these were freely offered).

Back when warmth was there
in abundance,
even on the coldest days
and in the loneliest places.

Back when there were
no sects,
no pollution,
no missiles,
no castes
and
no borders
(only frontiers and horizons free for the
R o  a  m   i    n      g).

Back when people still knew how to give
and how to
t
a
k
e
without harming.

Back when Civilization was not yet defined,
and storytellers sitting around
improvised campfires
dreamed up
history
and
religion.

Back in that admittedly mythical time,
though in truth, it is no more
or less mythical than any other
time,
including this very moment
in time.

Back when Man still cared about Woman,
and Woman about Man.
When
Adam
was truly in love with
Eve,
and Ammar
with
Iman.

Back when everything made sense,
even the Unknown.

Back in the time before
the Primordial Crime
of fear, hesitation, regret,
self-
induced
blindness
and
c
e
a
s
e
l
e
s
s
r a t  i  o   n   a   l    i    z   a  t   i   o   n.

Back in that particular time when
I once
lived
and
belonged.
And had absolutely nothing
for which to
a
t o n e.

Back then…
b
a
c
k
when,
I once actually managed to
be
l
o
n
g.
BELONG…

I
suddenly
find
myself

re  jec  ted
and

a l o n e.

For a mature and civilized
man
a tainted man,
can never really find
a home
in
such
a
warm
and
in
no cent
world.


Notes

The Mother Goddess: according to the latest archeological findings, one of the first deities to be worshipped by the ancient Syrians.

Baal, Anat, Apsu and Tiamat: the protagonists of several ancient Syrian and Mesopotamian myths dealing with the origins of the universe, the human race and weather patterns, not to mention death-defying love and other mythical notions.

Ammar and Iman: the protagonists of a modern myth dealing with the useless walls people build between themselves and others, the inability to dream, parental possessiveness and filial loyalty. In other words, this is merely a reference to a recent breakup which ended a brief love but intense story with a young Christian girl.


 May 1999